Happy ten months sweet girl. I think I am finally over the shock of how old you are becoming. All the other months have felt so bittersweet to me as I’ve seen my baby grow and grow with no regard to how small I want her to stay. Maybe I have just accepted that you will keep on growing and that the only way to stop time or go back in time is through the memories that have been planted in my heart. Or maybe it’s just that I am starting to get excited about the milestone that will be your first birthday. Perhaps it’s the excitement of planning a party to celebrate the beauty that is you and your first year of life, which has me looking forward instead of backward. Either way, today I am living in the moment of today, with one foot ready to step off the past, the other foot ready to step in the future, and my heart firmly in the present.
This past month has been the month of movement. There have been so many falls and bumps and, again, I am amazed at the fearlessness and perseverance of a child learning how to stand and walk. You are one fast crawler and are becoming a fast climber. You hate being restrained in any way (car rides have become so much fun!) and you love trying to climb up the many stairs in our house. Being mobile means you have learned new ways to get attention and I will admit that I love when you crawl over to me, pull yourself up using my jeans, and make your dinosaur noises so that I will look at you and pick you up.
This has been the month where we are really starting to see the relationship deepen between you and your sister. Cati makes you laugh like no one else. Her concern for you is so touching and the way you follow her around is so sweet. Sharing is an issue, but this is just another thing you two will have to learn how to manage. I just hope that you always love each other and enjoy one another’s company as you do now.
I call you Elina-bug, but the more appropriate name is Elina-saurus because you sound like a dinosaur with all your hissing and gurgling noises. One day Cati even said you sounded like you swallowed a crocodile. You do, however, have more sounds in your language and this month is when you started making the dada and mama sounds. You haven’t said your first word yet, but with all the movements you are making you are more focused on learning how to walk rather than learning how to talk. I’m almost expecting your first word to be something like “yogurt” because of all the yogurt you eat! As for eating, you are still a great eater. You drink four-5oz bottles a day and you will eat almost anything I put in front of you. The only thing you don’t seem to be too crazy about are fruits; it’s as if every fruit is too bitter or sour for you with the faces you make and how quickly you spit them out.
This month you got two new teeth and, at ten months old, you have seven teeth. Teething is the only time you are ever a “cranky” baby and, luckily for you, you don’t teeth for two long.
You flew on an airplane for the first time this past month and you were such a trooper. We spent six days away from home and, aside from hating the car seat, you went with all the changes. A trip away from home, whether it is to Texas or the grandparents’ house, is something that always makes me a little sad because you are doing certain things so much younger than I would have thought I would feel comfortable with because you have an older sister. I feel as if I am letting go a little faster with you.
Ten months have gone by my little one. Lots of letting go and seeing you grow and wanting the world to stop just so I can hold you just a little bit longer. While I curse Time at times, I also thank Time for not stop and propelling me forward. I know each future moment with you will be better than the moment now, but it’s hard to say goodbye to what was. It’s so easy to stay stuck in the what-was and what-is, but because of your sister I know that the what-will-be is worth this unstoppable movement forward.
I love you always and thank you for giving me these ten months with you. Being a mother has never felt so rewarding.