Saturday, December 15, 2012

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There is so much to update on but it all seems so far away, like something that happened last year where the details are fuzzy versus something that happened yesterday where the details are crisp. There is so much sadness and I wish I could reach out to all the families affected by the shootings yesterday in Connecticut and cry with them so they would know that even if I do not know their pain, I feel it. I have spent the past day staring at my girls, marveling in their beauty and innocence, and wondering how I can protect them and shelter them from all the bad in the world. I cannot begin to comprehend what it must feel like to know that you said goodbye and did not know it was the last goodbye you would say to one another. This safety we feel, in our schools, in malls, anywhere public, in moments like this, seems so false. My initial reaction was that I wanted to keep my girls home forever and never let them out of sight, but then I knew that, more than that, I did not want my girls to live in fear. I want them to cherish each day, to believe in the inherent goodness of people, and to believe in the power of love to unite and bridge gaps. There's no way to make sense of all the violence, no way to justify the lost lives, but we can face each day with the curiosity of a child instead of the jadedness of an adult. My heart goes out to all the families affected by this tragedy. Today I will hold my girls closer to my heart and thank God for giving me another day of not having to say goodbye forever.
Public Garden Rose

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