I reached a peak (or is it a low?) in my exhaustion. There cannot possibly be another level of exhaustion. I love my girls and I love being with them but I couldn't stop myself from fantasizing about taking a trip completely alone. To be somewhere without anyone knowing me. To not have to respond to anyone's needs or worrying about anyone's schedule. To have a real break and able to recharge. To carry a small purse for once and to be able to choose when to be awake and when to fall asleep. To have a break from being a mother and to have the chance to miss it. That won't be happening anytime soon so for now I simply wish to sleep in and miss out on the morning bustle of getting two kids fed and dressed for the day. Surely, that one's easier to do. Now if I could just have coordinate this with Alex's job we'd be set.
Here are the fun developments from the past week:
Circles. Cati draws circles now. Or in her beautiful imaginary world, she draws flowers.
Four-Month Appointment. Elina had her four-month appointment this past week and she's growing beautifully. Leading up to her appointment I was saying that she was going to measure smaller than Cati at four months. Compared to Cati's pictures, Elina doesn't look as chunky and she doesn't feel as big. I was right and Elina measured 1.5-inches and 1.5lbs smaller than Cati. Elina is healthy and developing right on target and it's things like this that serve to remind me that Elina is very different from Cati.
Fingers & Hand. My doctor asked me if I had any concerns about Elina and I mentioned how it's so hard not to compare siblings (I went into the appointment knowing Cati's measurements). He told me the best analogy and it's one I have been telling everyone who will listen all week. Children are like the fingers on your hand: they all come from the same hand, but each finger is completely different. Never heard truer words...
Brush Brush Comb Comb. Cati let me brush her hair! Twice! This is huge for me because the child doesn't let me come near her hair with the comb. I would always be jealous of the people at her school because she would let them brush and style her hair. Bows still don't last long but at least she lets me do a proper ponytail.
Here's to another week of finding a way to survive and laugh along the way.