Wednesday, April 11, 2012

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Lessons for my Daughters

There is so much I want to pass on to my daughters; so much that I want to do to prepare them for life. The bottom line is that life is hard, even when things go the way you want. A month before Elina was born I wrote about some lessons I wanted to pass on to them and now, almost two months into having two girls, I have a few more lessons for them. As our relationships with one another change and grow I hope to be able to pass these lessons along through discussion. I am so looking forward to being able to talk to both of my girls like adults, to really explore their brains, how they see the world and how they see themselves in that world. Almost all of these "lessons" were inspired by discussions with my own sister as she embarks on her own remarkable journey. Maybe, if I do a good enough job, my daughters will learn from each other like I have learned from my sister.
Be confident and sure of your decisions. It is so easy to let others affect how you think and what you do, but that only happens if you are unsure of the decisions you are making. Before getting others involved, try your hardest to make decisions on your own. Think of all the pros and cons. Solidify your position and, once you do, the opinions of others won't affect you as much. Knowing how you feel and the reasons why you feel that way, is very empowering. Trust yourself. 

Perspective. My mantra as of late has been "If you can't change your situation, change your perspective." Truer words have never been said. If you feel like your life is on replay, try changing the way you view things. Look for the hidden positives, the subtle differences. No two situations are ever the same, remember that.

White Knight. This is the greatest thing I heard: "Sometimes you have to be your own white knight" (on the show Burn Notice of all places). As women, we are bombarded with the notions of prince charmings and men coming to our rescue. I hope to raise daughters that are smart enough to know that they are more than damsels in distress and that they are strong enough to take care of and save themselves. Life has fairy tale moments, but it is no fairy tale and sometimes you do have to be your own white knight.

My girls are shy of 26 months and two months. There is so much I have learned and so much I have yet to learn. One day, sooner than I think, it will be my girls teaching me lessons about life. I look forward to it with all my heart.

1 comment:

Desi said...

You will learn from each other! That's awesome you have your sis to learn from. I love these life lessons.... they're so very true. You're doing a great job, Steph! Your girls are gonna grow up to be amazing women because they have a mama like you!